Tired + bland

Been awhile. Maybe too long? But then, how long is a piece of string, as they say? At least I am alive, breathing, still sensing. Although, what I am sensing is confusion, no sense of relief.
What has been happening? Well, not much riding - lucky to do it once a week at present, and the weather is only partially to blame - not having any cold weather clothes (e.g. arm/leg warmers) certainly does impinge on my enthusiasm! But then I have not anything about the fact that I have a room full of stuff at Sandgate, still unresolved, still uncontested, still.
Feel a definite loss of centredness, floating about in a miasm, pushed/pulled by forces that have naught to do with me, but still they encroach on me, destroying my sense of balance, adherence to stability ... Something is missing. Not eating 'properly' - not really eating dinner at all of late ... Since Monday this week, I think I have consumed three (3) bags of chips, drank copious amounts of cider, and even went to bed hungry one night?
Monday, oh Monday ... last thing Friday afternoon, leaving, Karla siddles up to say meeting with t/l + a/d 1st thing Monday, nothing to do about it, so don't worry. Wot me worry? Worry as in all good - do you want to do APS 4 job for awhile?; worry as in nothing you can do about it - here is your 14 days notice? Monday, even dressed for the meeting. Although seems I had forgotten socks, so had to wear Volleys instead. Anyway, had to face 3 'complaints' - gave advice to consolidating VinE about FBT to deal with enquiry (which is odd, because I do not have that great opinion about her); failed to deal with a panicing CSR who could not tell me what she wanted, so I did not know how to respond to the question ('she did not know what she wanted, so don't worry about that one' I am told); told Heather's group to 'shut their mouth' which is a Code violation, was not adhering to APS values, etc. (went to speak to Heather, thought they were all on break because the group was so loud and disruptive, realised that she was training, spoke up, and said 'please pay attention to your trainer and show the respect that you would expect' before walking off. Which did serve to silence the group)
Acknowledged that no support given, etc. but nothing has changed since or during. Spoke to a/d the next morning, acknowledged wrong way to do things, nothing further would come of it, t/l under a number of stresses, etc.
Floor walking for rest of week with trainees, Friday afternoon question from one about following scripting, not do POI, give PRN for HELP. Advise (as did 2 other floorwalkers) to be safe, do POI, argument that not what scripting says, advise whatever. Later notice all upset, blubbing, approach, to be told that I belittle and treat as LBH only!!! :o WTF??? Yet I am the one that has to apologise for looking out for them?
Have four days off, and I think I will need it too! Even though I have already accrued too much flex again ... Ooppss!!! But, what can you do?
Was to go to Spirit fair with P/A, but she cancelled. Which was quite good as I am not sure I could have coped. Even though I am trying to convince myself that it was something that needed to be done. Get so exhausted by people, so drained by interaction/dealing with foibles for such a long periods of time ... Told the training group that I generally have 25min relationships, yet would be with them, dealing intimately with them for 2 weeks ... wonder if they now can appreciate what it was that I meant by this, by how drained I am by such closeness?
Things to do this w/e, but feel so drained, husk-like, that I really just want to crawl into bed, turn the lights off, and sleep until it is over? Not that this has ever happened before, ever worked before, or offered anything more than a surcrease from the tidal waves crashing upon me ... but what did my stars in the local paper say?
Might go get some vegies + see if those t-shirts are available at Big-W, for I found some that read 'beer kats' which I think would be appropriate for the males of the team? Have to first see if there are any left, though ... :o

Just a few things of note

In my recent travels/adventures, I have come across a ute that I quite like and a pair of shoes that I have bought.